Sunday, August 05, 2012

I am seriously just sitting here at my computer, in my studio, completely and utterly stuck. what's up with that? It's not as if I don't have ideas in my head, or in my journal, or even projects to finish.  I just can't seem to make it happen. I feel overwhelmed, completely un-artistic, muddle-headed, and just plain devoid of...something...  god I hate that feeling. It's so hard to overcome. I am totally having these flashes of 'what if this next piece is crap' or 'what if I totally screw this up' and similar thoughts running through my head. It's maddening.

Part of it, I know, is that my studio is a complete disaster area. I have no room to work, I don't know where things are, there are too many things around that I DON'T need, and the list goes on. 'Just begin' the rational part of my brain says. 'It gets easier once you begin'...yes, yes, I know...but...

BUT WHAT???!!!!

Why do I do this to myself? I think that because I can only work in fits and spurts, I lose momentum. I get distracted.  I feel like anything BUT an artist.  These just sound like excuses don't they? Perhaps because they are.

I know it will pass. This isn't my first rodeo, right? Right.

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